Oh no, I don’t need to see your ID, you’re obviously old
How are you guys doing? It has been a while! I got busy, then lazy, then busy again.. but I’m here, and no this is not just an apology post. I’m still alive. Worry if I stop going on Twitter though, If I’m suddenly no longer Tweeting, then either the Y2K is happening, the internet died, or well.. uh, I chopped off all my fingers –who am I kidding.. I’d find a way. Anyway, here we go:
Aaaand cue Ragtime music!
Being carded when entering an age-restricted event, or trying to make a purchase rated more for the adult crowd such as a video game or those CD’s with many curse words in them, can be a little uncomfortable for some. We have the older folk over here, that get to do pretty much anything they want (and yes, that includes pooping in their pants), and the other crowd, those that look too young for their age. Sure, we’ve all felt like we were too young for our ages, especially those of you that are freshmen in high school or college or have just joined the workforce as young professionals.. but this is a whole other level of uncomfortable. That little card proves that you are worthy of what ever it is you’re planning on doing.
- Suppose you’re an older person, and you look your age.. and you’re hanging out with younger people. Everybody around you is getting carded, but when its your turn, when they ask to see your identification, it might be just out of courtesy. Sort of like how you don’t talk about obesity around obese people, or say racist jokes around people you just met. You guys get me? They’re asking you for your card, but they know you’re older than 21. And you know that they know. And they know that you know that they know.
- Imagine that you look a lot younger than your age, like you’re short, you have no facial hair, or you purchase very expensive moisturizer and therefore look really young. Somebody might look at your card and be like “Uh, is this really you?” because you were even younger in your picture and they’re suspicious.
- What if they ask you information about yourself to prove that its you? I don’t know about you guys, but my mind goes blank sometimes when I’m under pressure like that. A police officer once asked me for my name and I hesitated. Now imagine they ask something more complicated like my date of birth or my address? Ahh!
- The card has your picture. Yes, the picture that you wish you could retake at the DMV but they didn’t let you because there were 345,321 people waiting in line after you to take their pictures. Who isn’t embarrassed of their driver’s license picture? Showing anybody that thing is a little awkward.. and it contains private information. Who cares about your date of birth, or driver’s license number! It tells people YOUR WEIGHT! Which I guess doesn’t matter that much since you lied on it anyway. But still, it has your middle name! There.
Do you look your age?
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