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Posts from the ‘Awkward’ Category

That’s what she said.

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From lolsotrue.com

7 Most Awkward Meals to Eat on Your First Date

First dates are awkward enough already. Trying to find something to talk about, trying to leave a good impression, and making sure that there is no cilantro on your teeth are some of the basics. But if you want to step out of the “he orders a steak, she orders a salad” type of thing, make sure you don’t step out too far and enter.. The Awkward Zone.

Let’s get started:

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7. The Burrito – Well, maybe some people out there may find burrito-eating attractive.

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6. Spicy Soups – Runny noses, sniffles, and red eyes are not going to impress your date. Unless you can handle it without having to blow your nose halfway through, avoid super spicy stuff in general.

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5. Chicken Wings – Oh, that is beautiful.

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4. Things With Eyes On It – I was trying to add a picture of a pig’s head on here, but I couldn’t. It just looks like murder. Oh man, I can’t believe people can just eat stuff with eyes. That is actually one of my secrets, by the way. I have a very tough time eating something with eyes on it, even fish and shrimp. Having an animal on your plate is harsh enough.

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3. Smelly Stuff – If it has been fermented, has strong garlic, or any other lingering stink smell, avoid it for a while. Those do not go away overnight. Literally speaking.

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2. Things That Require a Double Dip – The famous egg roll. There is a reason why people opt for the mini version of these. Some couples are all into double dipping into the dressings and dips, but other people absolutely hate it. Sucks, so much sauce goes to waste.. man..

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1. Extra Crunchy Foods – I don’t mind the sound of crunchy foods, but I have heard this from many people in the past. And during a first date, where they can be a lot of awkward silences, crunching sounds taking over may not be the best idea. If you’re at a loud bar or restaurant, go for it.

 

What are some foods that you would NOT recommend to people on their first date?

Alright, everyone take out your Shake Weights™!

Google it.

You’ve heard me complain about spam here, but it has become a problem. I can’t keep my “open comment” policy, hahaha. People used to submit comments on really old posts without the moderation. You could submit awkward stories anonymously without worrying that you’ll land in a spam folder. Oh well.

The latest victim is my post on Farting in front of your partner for the first time. Check it out:

Screenshot from my desktop

Screenshot from my desktop

Noooo…

Ok, I’m over it.

So lately I’ve been going to the gym late at night, since I finally found a small 24-hour gym. No, I am not referring to 24-hour fitness. I have such a paranoia when it comes to large gyms and their contracts, that sometimes the reps cannot answer my questions. This one that I went to, I asked about their equipment maintenance, cancellation policies, their relationship with headquarters, about how they qualify their customers, and what other products they offer. Do they work on commission? How many clients do they have? Can I view a copy of the contract before coming in to sign it?

I’ve lost hundreds of dollars with big gyms before. That experience, plus my ability to make situations awkward  (it’s a gift), really gives me a boost in gym representative dissatisfaction. I don’t ask for free stuff, I don’t try to negotiate or complain. I just ask a lot of questions. How much do they get paid? No, I didn’t go there. That seems a bit rude, right?

Besides, the gym is just an awkward place anyway. From naked old people, to the meatheads at the free weights section. Putting a lot of sweaty people on machines that make you look like hamsters.. and then adding huge glass windows for people to look into in order to give that full hamster cage effect can really get to you. But man, some of us really have to work out.

Awkward. Out of breath already. From themetapicture.com

Awkward. Out of breath already. From themetapicture.com

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