18. Pimples

After rolling out of bed in the morning, you head to the bathroom to brush your teeth. You look in the mirror and there it is . . a pimple.

These seem to always come when you least need them; right before you get your picture taken, when you’re meeting a potential client for lunch or heading to an interview.

“Alright,” you might say, “these things are perfectly natural and they happen to people all the time.”

And yes, they do. But what happens when you see somebody with a huge pimple on their nose? You look at it. Admit it, you can’t help it. It is just the way our minds work; we see something that stands out in a person’s face and we’re automatically drawn to it.

The issue here, however, is how awkward this situation really is when the pimple is observed by someone else. You noticed the other person’s pimple, and they noticed that you looked at it. Darn it! You made it too obvious. When a person is speaking to you, and especially if he or she is being extra self-conscious for the day, they tend to follow your eyes in conversations in order to make eye contact. If you get distracted by that big red dot on their face, they will notice. And now you know that they noticed that you noticed. Don’t worry, even if you didn’t look at it, they would assume that you’re actually avoiding it just to be nice. Children won’t avoid it though, they’ll tell you the truth; so if they’re present prepare for some fun.You just can’t win here.

Good news! This situation doesn’t go very far. You will probably not discuss the pimple anyway, but be prepared if you have to. I’ve encountered a scenario where a girl asked me: “Does it look that bad?”

“No, I can barely see it.”

I could “barely see it” but from far. The thing was huge. She knew it. I knew it. Awkward.