See? We ARE friends 🙂
relationships
Talking about salaries
A little while back, I was at a talk in a community college classroom where an engineer from Boeing (they make airplanes, among other things) was giving a short lecture on how to better prepare yourself as a beginner in the engineering field. Suddenly, out of the blue.. an awkward guy straight up raises his hand and asks:
“So, like, how much money do you make?”
The young engineer at the front of the class got quiet, and looked at the host of the whole thing, then looked at the student again, and chuckled.
“If you want to know, I’ll tell you after the lecture… I mean, it’s no big deal but.. you know.”
“Oh, so what kind of car do you drive?”
“A Corolla?”
We all felt the tension in the room and we wanted it to go away, but could do very little about it.
Has anyone ever wondered WHY it is so awkward to speak about salaries?
I mean, even with our close friends and relatives. With our parents and siblings. With strangers at the bus stop. Why have we tabooed the crap out of it?
We make ourselves vulnerable by revealing how much money we make. It is almost like telling someone how much we weigh, or what your cup size is. We can all make a pretty good estimated guess, but refuse to bring attention to it at all cost.
I just find it funny how we just avoid the topic, and how easy it is to do so because nobody likes to talk about it. Not even “rich” people.
So, how much money do you make?
Haha, just kidding.
Here’s the question:
Are you open to speaking about salaries?
——-
From yesterday’s post:
How do you let someone know that you want them to shut up?
Excellent idea. Just lie your way out of there.Â
“But tomorrow is Sunday!”Â
“Yeah, its a Sunday test. It’s a pretty hardcore class!”
The good news is you can use that excuse 5 days out of the week.Â
When you really want someone to shut up but have to be polite
There are some people who really like to talk.
And I mean REALLY talk. Some do it because they are nervous, and others are just plain talkers.
I run into a few of these people about once a day. They tell you about their day, and about their life.. then make a comment about how they’re taking up your time, they apologize, and then keep talking.
For women in the dating world:
Imagine yourself sitting at a bar, with a couple of your girlfriends.. trying to act all cool. Suddenly someone takes the bait and he begins to approach you. Uh oh. Here he comes.
“Hello, I’m Jeff.”
“Melissa. Nice to meet you.”
“How is your evening going?”
“It’s going well, thank you.”
“Same for me, a couple of my friends had a blah blah blah…” and he goes on and on about people you don’t know doing things you don’t care about.
So he keeps talking and talking and you just sit there, Â smiling, looking away every once in a while hoping that he gets the message –but no luck. What do you do? Pretend to get a phone call? Say you need to go to the restroom? …yawn?
For men in the dating world:
Well, let us be honest here.. you probably think the date is going well if she keeps talking.
Haha.
I don’t know. Sometimes I just wish I could leave the person talking by themselves. How many times have you been on a phone call and literally put the phone down, go pee or make yourself a sandwich, and then pick up the phone again only to discover that the person still hasn’t stopped talking?
How do you let them know?
Dictator Valentine Cards
So awkward. Who thought of these? Haha
Umm.. Didn’t this post publish last night?
Awkward Valentine's Day Cards
Looking for some Valentine’s Day cards?
The day is a little awkward, let’s admit that to ourselves. Guys must look all anti-macho walking around with flowers, or thinking of something cheesy to do, and girls are all getting depressed and buying more servings of cookie dough. Hallmark should’ve thought of some other thing to celebrate besides this awkward stuff.
You know, in Spanish, Valentine’s Day is referred to as El dia del amor y la amistad, which translates directly to “the day of love and friendship.” I think that makes more sense.
Oh well, as promised:
Awkward Valentine’s Day Cards
1. For the I-don’t-know-what to say person
2. For the “Just friends? Yeah right, no one’s buying it” e-card
3. For your next ex-boyfriend
4. For the newly coupled (See: Valentine’s Day for Couples Who Just Started Dating)
5. For the awkward people out there. Yay, us!Â
6. For the settlers (get it? No? Ok, nevermind.)
7. For the bro
Images  obtained from:
someecards.com
cltampa.com
babble.com
sunsetintherearview.com
Bonus:
Attention all bloggers!
If you have an awkward date, get rejected, get caught cheating, over spend, break up, or end up in some uncomfortable situation this [or a past] Valentine’s Day, please share it with me and the people who accidentally stumble upon this site every day. You’ve probably noticed the awkward stories that get posted in the comments section all around this place, now it’s time to make them public! Don’t be scared to share, you get used to it eventually, trust me.
To submit your story, or questions (yes, I get the usual “Is it disrespectful to respond to a text while on the toilet bowl?” advice question for some reason), just look for the link titled “Submit” at the top of the homepage and enter it into the form. If you’re too cool for that, email me at awkwardlist [at] gmail [dot] com (substitute in the @ and . ). Minimum 6 words, maximum 70,000 words. It’s the first time I ever try this so please send me some stories to work with, otherwise it’ll just get really awkward around here. And no, this isn’t exclusively for Valentine’s Day-type-stuff, general awkwardness is accepted.
As always, if you have questions contact ME via Twitter, or via Awkward List’s Facebook page (what?) Yeah! The blog also has it’s own Twitter page for those who can’t follow via RSS, WP, email, or Facebook.. Posts get added on there right after I hit “publish” on here. 94 followers on Facebook, and 3 followers on Twitter (haha, yeah including me), but still, you guys ROCK!
Calling your boyfriend/girlfriend by an ex's name
lalalalala..
Conversation is going smoothly. Lalala.. wait for it..
Boom!Â
Wait, let me do that again:
BOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!1!1!!
It just slipped out, you said it.
Sometimes I wonder about those women who change boyfriends all the time, I mean how do they keep track of their names and such? How do they remember the guy’s favorite color or his favorite food? How do they not get names confused?
One of the posts that got Freshly Pressed on here —Â *applause*Â ..oh, thanks guys! ..*you guys are still applauding* thank you, thank you! *you guys don’t calm down* [barely audible: thank you guys, really] *applause* Thanks! *applause fades* …Â So what was I saying? Ah yes, the Freshly Pressed post —*applause*
Ok! Guys, seriously!
The freshly pressed post was titled “Forgetting someone’s name“, and even though it wasn’t that great or anything, it shows that this stuff is pretty common. When someone calls you by name, and you can’t remember their name, it makes the whole thing uncomfortable. The thing here is a little different though, you didn’t forget their name, you actually remembered someone else’s instead of their own.
I’ve been called Mike, Edgar, and even Hen. Every single one of those times, I just pretended I didn’t hear it. They noticed. And I let them simmer in the awkwardness.
And the same has happened the other way around. I made an interesting discovery: people will not usually call your attention to it. Though I am sure you can think of that one person that is not afraid of causing drama and will say “What did you just call me?”
In relationships though, things are a little different. It seems like even the simple things, such as farting, become a huge deal. Even liking or commenting on someone else’s photos can get you in trouble.
Things can get pretty crazy if you get the name wrong, just sayin’.
Well maybe that is a little extreme, but people get mad and feelings get hurt through that honest mistake.
Be careful. But don’t think about it too much because then you’re going to do it and then blame me for it. I don’t want that.
Have you ever been in an uncomfortable situation like that with your boyfriend/girlfriend?
Let’s keep it PG-Rated 13. With just a splish splash of R.
Hahaha, kidding, jeez.
Related articles
- Rent a Boyfriend/Girlfriend for Valentine’s Day! (starpittsburgh.cbslocal.com)
- In Defense of the Bitchy New Girlfriend (jezebel.com)
- 7 Things to do when things get awkward (awkwardlist.com) and hey look it’s our friend again!
144. Valentine's Day for the Couple Who Just Started Dating
Also, for that future couple who just met. Awkward.
Happy Monday, all!
A few additions around here, for this week leading up to the event that saves most greeting card and flower businesses, you will notice a chain of Valentine’s Day themed posts, and the girly pink-ish background.. aaand a new page titled “The Awkward List“. It took me a while to set up the links, so y’all better enjoy it. Oh and I will keep updating it as the awkward moments come in. We’re almost at 150!
And now onto the awkward.
The “L” word is absolutely everywhere, and anything else used as a synonym for Love will just sound awkward. Your friends are all talking about the romantic gestures they expect, or that someone on YouTube did, and you and your lover-to-be or your next-ex-boyfriend have absolutely no clue on what to do. You try to avoid all of those teddy bears with the hearts that say I Love You, and a dozen roses may make you seem overly attached.
People are getting engaged, people are being super gooey and romantic and calling each other weird nicknames, but your relationship just isn’t there yet. Though many claim that you can’t go wrong with chocolates…
Well I have no clue on what to do either, I just thought that I’d point out how awkward it is.
Â
Any ideas for those people out there?
Related articles
- 5 Tips for Valentine’s Day [4 the fellas] (tylatimes.com)
- I’d Rather be Alone This Valentine Day (socyberty.com)
- Valentine’s Day: Not Just For Lovers Anymore. Or Ever. (yoursarcasticfriend.com)
7 Things To Do When Things Get Awkward
What to do when confronted by an awkward moment:
You can be the most normal person in the world, but awkward moments can and will still happen to you. What you do afterwards can either make the situation better or more awkward. Let’s look at some good tips to follow when under these situations. In order to enhance your experience, please play the following song while reading this post.
Are you playing it? It’s the Benny Hill theme song. Oh yeah. Without further ado, let us begin.
Hug it out.
Handshake, high five, hug, slap? If there is any confusion about what’s gonna happen, just grab the person and embrace the crap out of them.
Mentally cuss out the person who did this to you.
Jerk.
Make the other person look like the jerk.
You’re going to give me a high five whether you like it or not!
Know when to walk away.
Sometimes there is no pocket.
Blow a kiss.
Even if she’s turning around.
Use your imagination.
Anything can happen.
Own it.
Go big or go home.
Awkward articles:
You look beautiful
142. Being embarrassed by something that happened a long time ago
So I was having an awesome day until I remembered something really dumb I said when I was 14.
It was one of those things, you know… when you become extremely embarrassed and wish that the moment had never happened. And you wish for that so much that eventually you block it out of your mind because if it comes back up, you’ll feel the same embarrassment all over again.
Certain situations increase the chances of you remembering such things. Things like meeting up with an old friend who knew every detail about it, and chances of it being brought up improve as the inebriation level increases whilst around said friend.
Contrary to popular belief, I don’t have too many of those situations. Ugh, I’m doing it again. I’m remembering the time I wrote a letter and it was found by someone who gave it to the girl, AKA the subject of the whole thing. Thank you, people. You’re making me remember all of it. I guess it could have been worse, though.
Sometimes, people feel that way when they think about their past relationships. For the guys out there, how many times do you wish you hadn’t done something for a woman? You think you’re being all sweet and stuff by getting her things and saying cheesy stuff, and then you break up and it all comes back to masticate you in the gluteals. Soon after, you can imagine her telling all her friends about how you made a complete fool of yourself when in reality she might just find it funny and only tells her new boyfriends.
Or ladies! Ever thought about a guy from your past and have been all like, “I cannot believe myself!”? Yes, us here at Awkward List (well, just me), cannot believe you either. But yes you did tell him that, and yes you let him do those things. Yes, we know, we know.. he said he would change, and yes you should’ve listened to your friends.
Aha!
Have you thought of something you that makes you feel the humiliation all over again yet?
Oops.
Now you have to share 🙂 Email me at awkwardlist (at) gmail (dot) com or submit it in the comments section please!
Oh about the letter? She said no.
Arigato.
Have a good weekend, everybody!
Edwin