Someone please tell me!
Someone please tell me!
So after a few minutes of being online today, I heard the news of the Boston Marathon explosions. Authorities are still trying to figure it all out, but so far there have been 2 dead and more than 20 people injured.
We try, and try again to not think of this world as a bad place. We like to think that people are good. We like to think that this was just an outlier in a sea of well-meaning, good people.
In my own way, I like to pay attention to the good and funny things in life. I enjoy paying attention to people, and details that we just don’t find the time to talk about. This is a blog about people. And I believe people are good.
In tough times like these, I like to remember a little story from one of my favorite people:
“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.” To this day, especially in times of disaster, I remember my mother’s words and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers, so many caring people in this world.” -Mr. Rogers
Please don’t forget that there is more good in this world than you may realize at this moment.
Let us get together, trust in each other, and become unstoppable using only forces of good.
Thank you for reading,
For you guys not in the United States, our government censors a lot of stuff and doesn’t give us graphic images in the news and such. They say it is bad for us. So we must go to the internet!
Imagine a crowd repeating: “To the internet!” while pointing to the horizon.
Please watch the video at the end of this article from the PSA in the UK. It isn’t too bad, I was able to hold in my breakfast just fine, and you can see the computer generated graphics anyway.
Since we’re in the mood for good causes and such lately around here, we should start a dumbphone drive to collect flip phones and old used phones to give to passengers for them to chuck at drivers that are texting while driving. I mean yeah, I ride my bike as often as I can, but when I have to get behind a steering wheel I find myself honking at more people than ever before because they’re going into my lane! If you’ve ever been yelled at with a “Get off your phone!” while driving around here in the Los Angeles/Orange County area, there’s a good chance it was me.
How many times have you gotten a text from a person that is driving?
It slows people down too, when the light turns to green, the drivers are so focused on their cell phones that they get honked at and then get mad at you and flip you off while blasting Britney Spears on their stereos. We all know that Getting Honked At is awkward.
If you are one of these people, please stop. You’re not just risking YOUR life, and you shouldn’t have the right to risk anyone else’s life.
Text her later. Airplane mode it. Hands-free phone call. Have Siri text for you. Be fully focused on operating your 4,000 lb machine at 97 feet per second.
Why don’t they show these things around here? Freakin U.S.
Walmart is a scary place, dudes. I’ve had my experiences there, but now I avoid it at all costs. For those of you who know me and have decided to pit stop there while driving somewhere, you’ve encountered my resistance to go in there. At first I blamed the lights, the high ceilings, the smell, all the stuff, and the customer service.. and even though I still don’t know what it is about that place that makes me feel super tired and angry, I’ve given up on trying to find out the reasons.
Last week, my mother decided it would be a good idea to buy a new juicer that is exclusively available at Walmart. She convinced me to drive her to two Walmarts and search for the darn thing. No luck. So in order to avoid going into the stores, I decided to order it using their Site-to-Store system and I was to pick it up at a store near my home in one of their 893,123,143,121,214 and a half locations worldwide. I didn’t put my name in the pick up order thing (so I could just say “Oh sorry my name isn’t on the pick up list thing.. oh no!”). The next day I got an email saying my order was cancelled. So I called the store.
Walmart 1: “Hello balskdllkg lskdflskdf Walmart alsnf?”
Me: Hi, I ordered something to pick up and it was cancelled, can you help me find it at another store?
Walmart 1: One second.
Me: Ok, no pr— beep.
Walmart 2 (some other lady): Hello, how may I help you?
Me: Hello, I ordered something online to pick up today, but it was cancelled. How can I find it?
Walmart 2: Please hold.
Me: But someone alrea– beep.
Walmart 3: Site-to-Store, what do you need?
Me: I’m wondering if you could help me find a Walmart that has an item that was cancelled by your store for pick up.
Walmart 3: Have you tried other stores?
Me: Other than Walmart?
Walmart 3: Yes.
Me: It is only available in Walmart.
Walmart 3: One second please.
Walmart 1: Hello, asdkvj walkdjs Walmart, asfvsdc?
Me: Hello, how are you?
Walmart 1: …
Walmart 1: I’m fine.
Me: Great! Have a good day.
So I decided to try calling a different Walmart, and I found the item in stock, ordered it and had it picked up by someone who came back with an interesting story himself. After talking to a manager and waiting in line twice, the juicer was picked up.
A while back, I was in a friend’s car when they decided to go to Walmart to pick up some stuff for a bonfire. Of course, I stayed in the car. Staying outside Walmart shouldn’t be a problem, right? WRONG! Looking through my phone and finding songs on Spotify, I almost forgot I was in a Walmart parking lot. Out of the corner of my eye I suddenly see a guy struggling to pull something out of his pocket from my left side. He approaches a dark Honda parked right across my friend’s car and pulls out a gun and shoots BBs all over the windows and makes a bunch of holes all over the car and then takes off running.
About two minutes later, a younger Walmart employee comes out and inspects her car. Yeah, it was her car. We called the police, waited around, and then filed a report.
Do you guys like that place?
138. That awkward, rushed-walk you do when someone holds the door for you because you’re too far
Ding ding ding, you’ve hit a double-awkward moment!
We’re going to discuss something very important today: The Hold-The-Door Radius.
Traditionally, at least here in the United States, human beings are known to hold the doors for each other. It is one of those things that may restore your faith in humanity when you see it. One complete stranger looking back at you, while holding the door with one arm and making sure that his 4-year old doesn’t run away, he smiles and you smile back . You say thank you as you grab the door yourself and make your way into the store. Kindness.
Then we ruin it.
Stores were all like “Kindness? What?” and made these things called Automatic Doors that open on their own. And sometimes they don’t. People can no longer do that. And can the 4-year old kid run away? NO! They make kid-leashes now.
Here’s what’s up with the Hold-The-Door Radius:
The Hold-The-Door Radius:
We all know about it, we see news reports all over the place about how fat America is getting. Hmm.. I know there are readers out there from other countries, so here is a question for you: Do you see news reports on fat America in your area?
Here in the U.S. we see them all the time! They’re always like “We are fat! Obesity is a problem. It can lead to diabetes, high cholesterol, sudden death, heart attack, depression..” the list goes on and on (and on and on). These things appear on the news so often, you’d think people aren’t actually noticing this stuff on their own. We see big people out on the street all the time, but for some reason, the news people think its an awesome idea to show clips of fat people walking around on the street.
I drew up that thing in like 10 seconds, sorry for the quality, but the whole missing-people’s-heads part is totally accurate. They news people go around filming the bellies and big butts of people walking by, and they probably feel super proud of themselves when they score a fat person holding a bag of McDonald’s or a fat dude walking around with an overweight child. Can you imagine seeing yourself on one of those reports?
“Look, I’m on TV!”
It is a horrible thing. According to kidshealth.org, one in three children are overweight or obese.But when I go pick up my little cousin from school, I see maybe one overweight kid out of a class of 20. I’m not sure if they took a survey outside of a food court or something, but it seems a bit exaggerated. I guess it makes sense though, don’t television network news channels get a kick out of scaring the crap out of everyone?
DEATH! VIRUS! WAR! MOTHER-IN-LAWS!
It’s like, dude c’mon!
Well since I’m not here to lecture on obesity, and we probably get enough of it elsewhere anyway, lets talk about the awkward moment when a fat people call themselves fat.
What are you supposed to do when a person calls himself/herself fat and they actually are?
I’ve tried to come up with something to say given the many opportunities I’ve had in this exact situation over the years, but I still cannot come up with a solid way out.. Hmm..
Let us look at our options:
OK, let’s hear it. What would you say?