Your Embarrassing Ringtone

132. When your ringtone makes the situation awkward.

I always like to joke about that iPhone alert sound that everybody has. I hear it everywhere. On the bus, on the train, in the restrooms at TGI Friday’s even over the sound of some dude throwing up in the urinals, I hear it in the library, and in my sleep. Even my phone does it sometimes, and the tone was the first thing I changed on it. Freakin’ Siri.

One of my friends, Mike, from college always had a thing for hardcore rap music.. and his ringtone was some song that started with the F word and the N word and well, you guys get the point. When he would get a text message it would yell out a bunch of curse words. It was funny at first, until it went off in class. Then during a meeting. His phone would just start screaming these things at maximum volume.

Sometimes I hear Mexican music, the kind that speaks of drugs, money, and violence and the owner of the cell phone feels a little embarrassed by it when it rings. Well if you’re going to be embarrassed by it, why do you have it? My ringtone is Island in the Sun by Weezer and I love it. It rings and I just let it fill the room. I pretend that I have super slow reflexes or that I can’t find the  “shut up” volume on my phone. It’s awesome! Well except when I miss the phone call for waiting too long to pick up.

See, your ringtone says a lot about you and you only get ONE song to prove yourself to others. Will you have some Metallica, or Britney Spears? It shows what you’re like and how you feel (or felt when you chose it).

  • Do you have a generic tone? The usual, lalalalala tone?
  • Do you blast some upbeat pop song?
  • Is your ringtone .. emo?
  • Do you just keep it on vibrate?

We have to think about these things. Because the situation goes from normal to awkward in .8 seconds based on it. Two scenarios:

  1. You’re at a funeral-
    “I am so sorry for your–”

    *The Laughing Baby Ringtone comes on

  2. “–um, excuse me.”
  3. You’re on a first date –
    “Yes, I definitely agree, women deserve that respect. They’re not objects, you know?”*Ringtone: Oh yeah, make it nasty, make it nasty, yeah shake that thang*

    ..followed by an awkward silence.

What’s YOUR ringtone?


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